messy thoughts
Comments 13

Things Your Mama (or Someone else) Told You

So many of us have taken societal standard upon ourselves. We’ve accepted others opinions or ideals as our own. We leave home dressed in a way someone else likes, we speak about things other people are interested in. We go through our days only chipping away at the surface of our full abilities. Everything we do/think, within our own minds or in another human interaction, is an opportunity to expand our own views and those of others. It’s a chance to break down barriers set by someone else.

Here are 5 examples of things you may have heard over the years that are total bullshit (or at least something you should form your own opinion on)!

1) If you hug, kiss, or tell someone you love them, and they’re of the same gender, you’re now gay and must label yourself. 

Doesn’t it seem like any time two people of the same gender kiss, people ask questions? Why is that? Can’t love be fun and without walls? Don’t feel confined or required to label anything! Love freely and without judgement.

2) Women should wear bras and shouldn’t show their nipples, it’s rude.

Rude? To who? Who is insulted by the human form? If someone is, then I believe that their inability to accept bodies as they are in their natural state is the issue, not the bodies.

If someone you know points out that they can see your nipples or some other form of commentary, don’t be afraid to say “Yes, i’m aware of that, it’s my body” and then you can simply change the topic! But you deserve to feel like you can stand up for yourself.

3) You have to go to college.

Education is a powerful force! It’s also a privilege. But that being said, it’s not for everyone. Going to school just to go to school, most likely won’t be beneficial to you. Don’t forget that you have so many options! There are lots of things you can do to enrich yourself mind, in school or out. You’re able to learn something in every moment.

4) Drugs, alcohol, or the way you dress can be a fair excuse for the actions of men (or Anybody).

Never. When someone takes it upon themselves to act in a certain way, it is the fault of no one but them. They know whats drugs and alcohol do, and as for clothes… Your way of dressing yourself, no matter how great you look, is NOT an invitation for anyone to verbally or physically harass you.

5) Keep to small talk, it’s how you get people to like you.

Small talk is repetitive, robotic, and meaningless. Find someone you can be real with. Find someone you can connect with on a higher, more intellectual, thought provoking level! Again, time to push the boundaries of social norms.

Remember, not everything you heard growing up is true. Question everything! You are entitled to exploring your own thoughts and views. Of course you should refrain from violence or being rude, but don’t take what others say at face value. Invest yourself in the movement for change. 

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13 Comments

  1. Anonymous says

    I feel like the thing about small talk is something I really relate to. People in my life, including my parents, have always acted like small talk is some vital skill I am lacking in, and need to get better at. I have always felt like there was something wrong with me because I was not good at it. Then I realized that there are other people who also do not care about wasting time discussing pointless things (:

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Nobody has ever made a comment about being able to see my nipples, but if somebody ever does, I planned out the perfect response: “Dude, mammals have nipples, what did you expect??” Loved this piece Emma ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Aubrey says

    This post was very enlightening, it made me think about the everyday things I do that might not just be “me”. Thank you for the small push in a direction I didn’t know I had.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Anonymous says

    This year in school we had to write a paper on what books have influenced our thinking and I used 1984 as an example. I said that it taught me to question things that are generally accepted. This just made me think of that. I think it’s so important to form your own opinion on things and have your own thoughts!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I love this post so much! It’s only over the past couple of years that I’ve been questioning everything and it’s so so freeing! I’m more confident in myself, my values and my beliefs, and can stand up to shaming and other people’s negative judgements.

    Liked by 1 person

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